Dear Soccer Mom

[thepeopleseason]

When you're driving on an interstate-to-interstate on-ramp, and there's a moderately-sized upturned orange cone in the middle of the left lane, consider the following before making a complete and abrupt stop on the on-ramp:

1. You are driving a Mercedes Benz M Class SUV. Since it's on its side, the cone will likely pass right under your car.
2. There are a few large and heavy vehicles moving at a fast rate of speed behind you.
3. Whatever damage the soft plastic cone may cause to the undercarriage of your overpriced luxury SUV is in no way comparable to the damage it will receive if I plow my vehicle into its backside.
4. Next time, quit being a fucking assbag, don't speed up your car in some machismo-inspired act of roadhoggery, and let the person in the merge lane merge. Maybe next time you won't get caught by a stupid cone unawares, and nearly kill the three drivers behind you.

And to think, more than likely, if I hadn't avoided your stupid, big, silver ass, I would have been the one at fault.